We Are Officially Back Home

What a trip.

We made it.

What a mess still.

But we’re at our home. We’re in our mess. Our fixer-upper.

The kitchen is nearly redone. We’ve got the floor to finish installing still. New addition is all finished, minus a few things here and there.

Every door and frame was warped–except the hardwood doors I bought– to my wife’s complaint at the time. “We don’t need these heavy, solid doors. The kids will get their fingers chopped off, we’re not living in a castle, bla bla bla.”

“I don’t have to worry about them getting banged up with a little wear and tear and if it ever floods, they’ll last.”

“It’s not going to flood that high.”

“You’re probably right. But… I already have the doors.” Deal with it, I finish in my mind.

“That’s because you got them without talking to me.”

“That’s because I’m the boss. You’re the wife.” Runs for my life.

Anyway, everything here is beautiful. The forest is peaceful off the back porch. It still makes me pause and stare when the sun is out, shining through the barren winter trees. It never fails to inspire a spark inside. To do, conquer, live, love. Repair, change, tweak, grow. Plants, hearts, minds. Herbs. I can’t wait to get back to all of that from our home. There is nothing like owning something like a home and land. I don’t care what shitty state it’s in, it does something for a man. I think we’re definitely designed to take dominion. Over the land, our time, our lives. Our wives. 🙂 Sorry but that has to be the funnest part. You know, she flirts with me in subtle ways. It’s our little unspoken secret. She used to get offended when I didn’t openly respond to her flirting. To me they were assaults and I stored up payback with little smiles and nods.

Since we’ve been back, it’s like a honeymoon again. This morning after doing minor this and that stuff in the bed, she asked me if it was good hahahahahahaaaaaaa. By habit, I”m not the most “expressive” man when it comes to some things and she knows this well. So, I say “yep” hahaha. I know she’s not going to leave it at that, she loves to drag the details out and I love making her. “You sure it was good?”

“Yes, I’m sure.”

“Like on a scale of 1-10, how was it.”

“10 and 1/2”

She smiles and lays next to me. “You don’t have to lie, you know.”

“Fine. 11.”

Brownie points earned. Mmmm, now I want cookies. Jan’s cookies. I think it would be nice if she made us some “aftermath” desserts to snack on since we don’t smoke.

So… would seem as though the time difference between cyber space and real life passes in years. So, I’ve been gone for five years it feels like. During those five years, I’ve disconnected from a soul-sucking energy and have found I’m not racing to jump back into it. I’m still standing on the outskirts looking in. Dipping my toe in here and there. Bracing for impact. But, work is calling. I’ve a book coming out next Friday and I’m behind on the buzz building. Graphics to create, covers to finish, rally cries to shout, trumpets to blare, drums to boom boom boom.

Now to “hold on” to that piece of peace I’ve gained. I wrote 9.5 thousand words on the 4th day of my exile, can you imagine. I also broke through a ceiling in my writing craft and oh how fun and exciting that is. Now to break through that marketing ceiling. And can I just say how much damn fun I’ve had writing! Writing Bones story has been a lot of fun this round as I find my groove in his existence. I can’t wait for you all to read it. May be my best write yet.

Anyway, I just wanted to update everybody all at once. Grand slam. I like slamming things my wife says. She’s right. I won’t deny it. I told her she needs to embrace it like she does in the bedchambers. Wench.

I’m in a mood. The blow spit balls, take two hours to fetch something from the office closet and even longer in the cafeteria kind of mood. Like I said, we’re back home. But that clearly doesn’t mean “I’m back here” hahaha.

See you around in the cyber halls my friends. Look back, you may find me right at your shoulder. And you may not.

Lastly but certainly not leastly, I’d like to thank all my freaky friends who held the fort down while I was away. Raises my coffee to them #bitchinboombringers — shoulder pats all around my friends. Shoulder pats allllll around.

P.S. I also have many book orders to fill, cards to send, stories to write,  so you ladies, you know who you are, hold tight to your silk stockings. Catching my breath and will get on that pronto.


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8 Responses to We Are Officially Back Home

  1. This made me smile!! Glad your are back lording over your dominion! Glad to be a part of the boom bringing xoxo

  2. Nan Lindsey says:

    Oh it is so good to see you relaxed and happy and peaceful! To hear about the emerald canopy a little sparse but there!
    I love yours and Tara’s playfulness.
    We have been waiting for this for many months now! I hope you enjoy it and revel in the peace and HOME!

  3. Jan Wade says:

    You are in a mood and it sounds like a good one. I’m happy for both of you that your home is once again your sanctuary. Now I’m even more excited for Bones 2 since it has your BIGGEST BOOM endorsement! “Aftermath cookies” will be on the way and I’m guessing there will be a pineapple coming, also. Have fun writing and easing your way back into the thick of things. You were missed.

  4. lizzy smith says:

    Oh I’ve missed your family stories! Especially when u smack talk the wife and run for your life! Hahaha. I’m so very happy for you both. I understand what u mean fully about owning your own land. We are on only 2/3 acre and I call it my Husband’s Kingdom. So LIVE ON BANES!! You have re-stormed your castle!

  5. Juliette says:

    Thanks for the update…I’m picturing it all…and in your respite you’re slow to come back, well, I hear that! As the Bones date draws near…I think the old on-the-go you will will fight you to get back, like Reggie and Bones. Enjoy your peace and quiet (for now) 😉

  6. Lora Ann says:

    HUGE grin on my face. Welcome home! 🎉🎈💐💗

  7. Lisa Nicholl says:

    I’m really glad that Mrs Bane and you are back Home.
    When you love the one you’re with, you can make any place a home, but to be back Home, where the happy memories dwell. There’s nothing like it, I imagine.
    All the best 🙂


  8. Tracey says:

    Just to breathe in your own space, good or bad, it’s your space, your digs. Taking a break from the outside world. Even when forced upon you, is rejuvenating for your mind, body and soul!

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  • Note:

    I usually refer to males as the more dominant and females as the more submissive. The intention is NOT to say that ALL relationships should fit that pattern. My relationship experience is with male dominant, female submissive arrangements and that is the only sort of relationship I have firsthand knowledge about.